The Real World

Tue Aug 8, 2023
Tags :  humor

Dear professor,

My name is Ishan, and I was in your Materials course in my third year, some years ago. I hope this email finds you well. You once told me that the reason we study and test the understanding of primitive techniques is because I “wouldn’t use these fancy programs when [I will be] out in the real world”.

But here’s the thing: against all odds, I landed a great and fulfilling job after graduation. I am a Senior Materials Engineer now, and every day I have been forced to use software for material selection and process management.

Now the only conclusion here is that I am not yet in the “real world”. Which, for obvious reasons, is quite unsettling to me. What do you know? What do you know that I don’t? When does the real world begin? How do I get there? Every day I ask my manager whether I can use pen and paper. I tell him “I know how to read Ashby charts, I know how to make a PERT diagram. I can do it on paper, my professors tested me well.”

…and every day he tells me to “just use the goddamn software”, because it’s easier for the rest of my team.

Am I only in the real world on the weekend? Were you trying to warn me that capitalism is not the real world? How do I escape this purgatory? How do I get out? Where did I go wrong? Please respond. I have to know.

Anxiously awaiting your response— Ishan Jain


Footnotes

  1. Any similarities to persons or events, whether real or fictional, are unintended and completely coincidental.
  2. Adapted from this post by Tumblr user @glitch1920

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